020:: How I Deal With Comparisonitis

Lexi D'Angelo



If you’re a living breathing human, I’m willing to bet you’ve experienced bouts of comparisonitis.

If you’re a super-evolved alien who’s never compared themselves to another person, go ahead and skip this post.

But for the rest of us unicorns, let’s talk about what to do when you find yourself wrapped up in thinking things like “Why can’t I be more like THAT girl?!”

I know there’s been maaaaany a time I’ve seen people getting business results, living their life a certain way, or whatever and been all like, “What’s wrong with ME that I can’t do the same?!” And it would send me down this crazy spiral into a low point of exasperation.

In fact, I’ve hosted numerous masterminds + group experience where the womxn were so concerned about what other people were doing they weren’t even owning their own desires. It takes getting out of comparison status to really be unapologetically true to ourselves. And ultimately, that’s what will bring us success.

Let’s talk about how you can stop comparing, start taking aligned action, and ultimately design your success by overcoming comparisonitis.


You are an original. You are the only YOU in the Universe. And the more you own your unicornly you self…

The more ‘comparison’ and ‘competition’ becomes totally irrelevant.

When you think things like, “My industry is soooo crowded, there’s so many coaches out there” you’re limiting your potential for greatness! Imagine how many people there are in this world. Now think about how many coaches you know.

There are not enough coaches out there to provide all the transformation that’s needed! The world needs MORE coaches (can I get an a-men up in here).

You could literally be using the same modalities, teaching the same shiz, yada yada as the coach standing next to you. The differentiating factor is you in all your you-ness. And that’s what your people need.

It’s not just about finding the right program. Your peeps are also looking for the person they’re the most in alignment with.

P.S. If you’re super in alignment with me and this message is lighting you the fuck up, I recommend you check out my program Quantum $hift that’s open for enrolment right now.

Know what all the above means?

It means the more time and energy you put into your self care, loving yourself, and being abundant, the more magnetic AF you get.

So, don’t forget to take care of you boo thang. Focus on your joy, happiness, and abundance first. This is how we close those energetic leaks and draw in our dream clients with ease.


I remember a client recently bringing up one of my other clients on a call. The convo went something like:

“Oh my gahd it’s so amazing to see what Sally Sue is doing, she’s getting such amazing results.”

And I was like:

“Yesssss, Sally Sue is doing amaaaaazing things. But also… Sally Sue has been working with me for 3 years now! When she was where YOU currently are, she had all kinds of BS we had to clear out to get the results she’s getting today.”

It’s so cray cray to compare your beginning to someone else’s middle. Keep it in check, that person you’re looking at right now and comparing yourself too is:

  • Number One: At a totally different place in her journey
  • Number Two: Writing a totally different book

You wouldn’t take Chapter 20 from Harry Potter and compare it to Chapter 20 from Twilight, right? Naaaaah. That would be weird.

Even though they’re both magical tales full of adventure and fun, the plots are completely different. So, don’t lose your shiz and sanityover your plot looking different from that other person’s plot. Or you might never get to see where your own adventure takes you.


I remember I used to compare my coaches to goddesses and their message was the holy grail. And then when they would do something, ya know, human… I would be so disappointed and question everything.

Remember this, people are people are PEOPLE. Just because someone’s a multi-six or seven figure earner doesn’t mean they’ve got all their shiz together.

We’re all dealing with our own ish. Social media is the highlight reel. You’re comparing yourself to a highlight reel, glimpses of the best moments, without knowing what’s going on behind the scenes.

Focus on your own story and creating your own highlights. Because there’s no one who you can compare yourself to accept who you were yesterday.


Not only is comparisonitis something that you have to overcome to really embody your full power, it’s also something you can use as a tool.

The next time you catch yourself looking at someone and thinking…

“Gah look at her body, she’s so fit and healthy, I’m so jealous.”

“Omg she grew her business to five figure months in x amount of time, why haven’t I done that yet?”

“So and so just had a five figure launch and I haven’t even broke my five figure month *wah*”

Catch yourself, first. Cus you got this, and you got you.

And then, shift. Quantum $hift… as in use this knowledge to make yourself some serious bank. ‘Cus anything you recognize as desirable in someone else means you possibly want it too.

This means you get to use it to fuel your fuckin’ fire. Set new goals. Dream bigger.

And not only that… Use them to acknowledge what you truly want. Even if you see what that other girl is doing, recognize it as amazing, is it really what YOU want?

Check in with you the next time you compare and dare to ask “Do I just want that because she has it… or would that really bring me fulfillment?”


When I first started my coaching business, I had super fast results. Buuuut a lot of that was because I was trying to keep up with the Coaching Kardashians. Make sure you ask yourself when you’re goal setting:


  • Is this what I actually want OR
  • Is this something others are doing I feel like I ‘need’ to be successful?


Here’s how to do it using my Magic Keys Method, a tried and true approach I use all the freaking time to make sure I’m in alignment and on track with my True North.

  1. Write down the idea or thing you’re jealous of, triggered you, inspired you, etc.
  2. Ask why it’s something you want.
  3. Find proof of magic. Who is doing something similar that can inspire you?
  4. Find the next aligned action you can take to receive that thing

I would love to hear how you’re using these steps to align with YOUR true desires. Hit me up on Instagram here and share your story with me!


We get so easily wrapped up in comparisonitis that we often forget to have gratitude for what we have. You might be so busy wanting to lose ten pounds, you forget to love the skin you’re in.

But it’s not just about ‘getting there’… Life is about living every step of the journey. You gotta appreciate whatchoo got even as you gun for your goals.

We have so much to be grateful for and it’s easy to focus on what everybody else is doing. But when we focus on what we DO have, the possibilities seem way more endless and available to us.

You don’t HAVE to do anything. Go to the gym, create your own business, record a podcast… You GET to. You’re so lucky!!!

And that shift is enough to truly invite more in. The people who are out there killing it… they’re there to show you what’s possible. To encourage you to do more and dream bigger. Not to shrink you because you don’t feel good enough.

The way we think sets our subconscious mind up for what it believes. We get to choose whether it’s “YAY! That’s available for us!” vs “Ugh, I hope she secretly fails.”

Manifest the celebrations, the magic, and all the goodness! Remember: You are uniquely YOU… and that’s what sets you apart from everybody else.

Nobody compares 😉

Get ready to walk away with a renewed sense of confidence and clarity. And of course, be sure to share your big takeaways with me over on Instagram (www.instagram.com/lexidangelo).


Are you subscribed to The Lexi Show? If you’re not, whatcha waiting for?! I’m adding some epic episodes this year and if you’re not subscribed there’s a good chance you’ll miss out on those. So clickity-click here to subscribe in iTunes!

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Lexi D'Angelo

Love + Spice,

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